Crossdressing is a joy and pleasure for so many individuals, and in public it can be a daunting experience, but it can also be a liberating and rewarding one.

For many crossdressers, the first time they step out in public in their feminine persona, it is a moment of great excitement and anticipation. They may feel nervous about how they will be perceived or if they will be recognised, but they are also eager to finally be able to express their true selves in the world and to flaunt their femininity, and this ‘Stepping Out’ into the world is something that is on most crossdressers to do list.

Stepping Out

For the crossdressers who are ‘Stepping Out’ for the first time, or those preparing to do this, there are a few things that you can do to make the experience of going out in public a little bit easier, to help with some initial fears.

If you have confided your desire to dress with family and friends, have a chat with them to let them know that you are ready to venture out, and then they will be there to support you if needed. But if you are doing this alone, then first and foremost, it is important to choose an outfit that makes you feel confident and comfortable, with layers so you can adjust your look whilst out, if needed.

Choose a time and place to go out where you are likely to feel safe and accepted. To start, you might want to choose a place that you are familiar with, like a park, a coffee shop, or a shopping centre during the day when it will be less busy. Remember to be aware of your surroundings, and don’t put yourself in danger; and always walk away if you feel unsafe. When first venturing out it may be an idea to take a change of clothes, so if you change your mind or run into trouble, you can change your look.

Once you are out in public, it is important to relax and be yourself, don’t be afraid to smile and be friendly. Most people are accepting of crossdressers, and you may even make some new friends. The majority of people are not going to pay any attention to you, and if you do get any stares or comments, rise above and try to ignore them.

The most important thing is to enjoy yourself and to celebrate your true self and you may just be surprised at how much you love it.

Crossdressing is a personal choice, and you should do what makes you feel comfortable. If you’re not ready to go out in public yet, that’s perfectly fine too, there’s no rush. Take your time and enjoy the process.

Confidence Is Key.

As with everything in life confidence is key, so make a point to practice, practice, practice!

The more you dress up and go out in public, the more comfortable and confident you will become and when you are feeling good, you will look good!

Practice your make up looks beforehand, and try different shades and tones, as the look will always change depending on what hair style and colour you go for. It’s also always good to note that ladies attract more attention than men, so when you are out, you will naturally attract more attention than ‘he’ does. Don’t let this bother you, ignore the stares and focus on enjoying yourself. Start by going to the places you feel safe and comfortable, and as you gain more confidence, then you can start venturing out to more crowded places.

Choose your outfits carefully. When you’re first starting out, it is sometimes best to choose outfits that are a little more modest and allow for you to blend in with the crowd as this will help you to feel less self-conscious. But as your confidence grows, you can start to experiment with more daring looks, and find the style that is you. Regardless of what you wear though, always carry yourself with confidence. Walk with your head held high and smile. This will help project an air of confidence, which will make you less likely to attract unwanted attention.

Another point to think about, is that while you are out and about, there may be a time where you are recognised, so prepare for this. You can’t control what will happen, but you can control how you deal with the unexpected and thinking through these scenarios prior to stepping out will help with your confidence, as you will be prepared for the situation, should it arise.

A key thing to remember, is that you are not alone. There are many other crossdressers out there who have faced the same challenges. There are online communities and support groups that can offer you help and advice. Building confidence takes time and practice, but it is possible to overcome your fears and live your life as your true self.

The Fear of Being Recognised

The fear of being recognised while crossdressing is a common one, and when you look in the mirror you will see some of your male self in the reflection, but in most cases, others do not. However, it can be a very real fear, especially in areas where there is a lot of prejudice against crossdressers. There are a few things you can do to help reduce the risk of being recognised:


It is important to work on your feminine appearance and manners if you want to pass or blend in when you step out of the house, as how you look will be the first thing others notice.

Take care of your skin, as this is the foundation of any good makeup look. Removing any facial hair is a must, and remember to cleanse, exfoliate, and moisturize your skin regularly to ensure it is the best foundation for your make up. There are many different techniques that you can use to create a more feminine look, using it to enhance your features. Experiment with different products and techniques to find what works best for you but don’t just stop at make-up. Look at different styles and colours of wigs, as different colours and styles will work better with different skin tones and face shapes.

When you are dressing, focus on creating a silhouette that is both feminine and flattering, avoiding clothes that are too baggy or too tight. Think about enhancing your feminine figure with breast forms and shape wear, some with built in hip pads, and don’t forget the tuck, which can be assisted with Gaff Pants. All this will help create your feminine shape and illusion.

Pay attention to the little things too like your nails and hair. Both can make a big difference in your overall appearance and confidence. Keep your hair styled and your nails clean and trimmed, or painted with a neutral colour, until you find the confidence to wear the Jungle Red!

Finally, look at your feminine mannerism, take time to observe how other women walk and stand, and practice in the mirror, keeping your movements natural; but one of the best ways to pass as a woman is to walk with confidence! Hold your head up high and walk with purpose, as the most important thing is to be yourself and don’t try to be someone you’re not. Just be confident and comfortable in your own skin.

Clothing Makes the Moment.

The clothes you wear play a big part in how you feel, so always choose clothes that fit well as being too tight or too loose will make you look uncomfortable and out of place. It is important to find clothes that fit you well and make you feel confident.

Choose clothes that are appropriate for the occasion you are going to and that flatter the figure. If you are going to a formal event, you will want to dress to impress, more so than if you are going to a casual event. If you have a curvy figure, you will want to choose clothes that accentuate your curves, and if you are petite, you will want to choose clothes that make you look taller. It is important to dress for the occasion so that you do not stand out in a negative way.

Selecting accessories that complement your outfit is important too, from your shoes to your jewellery. These should match the occasion but also add a touch of personality to your outfit. If you are new to wearing heels, practice at home until you have the walk you want. A good tip is to put on your heels and do an activity that involves movement, something as simple as hoovering the lounge will work as by doing this you are not concentrating on how you are walking; you are just doing it! And when choosing accessories, it is important to choose pieces that complement your outfit and make you look your best.

There are many different styles of clothing available, so do not be afraid to experiment with different styles until you find what works best for you. It is important to find a style that makes you feel confident and comfortable but ensure that you pay attention to the details. The fit, the feel, the look, and with accessories sometimes less is more!

Everyone is different and it is important to dress for your body type/shape and don’t forget to let your personality shine through in your choice of clothing. If you are a fun and outgoing person, you might want to choose brighter colours and more patterns; if you are more conservative, then you may want to choose more muted colours and simpler styles. Never be afraid to ask for help and if you are not sure what to wear, you can always ask a friend, salesperson, or stylist for help as they can help you find clothes that flatter your figure and make you feel confident.

Location, Location, Location.

Before you go out, it is important to be prepared. Make plans for what you are going to do, and where you are going to go.

For your first time, choose somewhere you know, somewhere outside, and at a time where there will be fewer people around as this will make you feel safer. Keep yourself calm and composed, find the lady within, and project her confidence. Always be aware of your surroundings and be prepared to leave if you feel uncomfortable, as there is no shame in leaving if you are not feeling safe.

Alternatively go out with a friend or a fellow T-Girl/Crossdresser. Having a friend or companion with you will help with your confidence as well as making the whole experience more fun, and safer for you.

Never be Afraid to Ask

You are not the first crossdresser to be Stepping Out for the first time, so don’t be afraid to speak to other Crossdressers or T-Girls who have already stepped over the threshold. You will be surprised on how much help and support you will find from your community.

Remember to Have Fun and Be Prepared

When you’re outside, it’s important to relax and let go of your worries. This can be difficult, especially if it is your first time and you are a little stressed, but it’s important to remember that you’re there to enjoy yourself, so try not to let your worries ruin your time outside. Relax and enjoy yourself, and don’t think of what others may or may not be thinking, as this will take the fun out of your day. Let it go and enjoy yourself, and truly embrace those glances from the men that you have been waiting for.

As with life, for all the planning and preparation that you can put in place, sometimes things don’t always go as expected. It’s important to be prepared for unexpected turns and having a Plan B in case your original plan doesn’t work out.

It’s always a good idea to carry identification, money, and your mobile phone with you when you’re crossdressing outside, and if you plan to go somewhere further away from home, it may help to pack a set of male clothes and shoes. These actions will help you if you need to call someone for help, if you have a wardrobe mishap, or if you get lost. They will also give you more flexibility if you suddenly feel like it would be dangerous to be crossdressing or if you feel the vibe is not right where you are.

Have Fun!

The most important thing is to have fun. When you’re outside, enjoy the fresh air, the sunshine, and the beauty of nature. Don’t worry about anything else, just relax and enjoy yourself. Don’t let the fear of being recognised stop you from embracing the joy of Crossdressing.

Everyone is different and what works for one person may not work for another, so the most important thing is to do is whatever makes you feel comfortable and happy.

Love Team Be a lady

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